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Last Updated on November 3, 2026 by Kelly
Menopause. It’s a three-syllable word that strikes fear into the hearts of most women.
Besides the fact that it’s nature’s way of saying “You’re not young anymore,” it’s also feared due to misinformation.

One piece of misinformation is that menopausal women can’t get wet at all or enjoy sex. While menopause can bring challenges, the truth is that having sex and enjoying it is still possible.
I wanted to write this article to give women the facts about menopause and also share some toys that are menopause-friendly.
What Are the Benefits of Sex Toys for Menopause?
Use it or Lose It

The biggest benefit is the reality of “Use it or lose it.” This philosophy rings true as you get older.
For example, as you get older, your muscle mass and energy levels can drop, but increasing exercise can drastically slow down or even reverse some of those effects.
The same principle applies to sex. Yes, as you enter menopause, hormonal changes can make you feel less wet and kill your sex drive.
But if you use toys frequently, it can help to keep you sexually active as you get older.
Also Read: The Benefits of Sex Toys for Seniors
Increased Blood Circulation
As you get older, one concern is that vaginal tissue starts to loosen. Sex toys, particularly vibrating ones, can help to increase blood flow to your pelvis, making it much more elastic.
How toys bring blood to this area depends on what you’re doing.

Vibrators can stimulate your nerve endings, which can travel to your spine, make your blood vessels dilate, and bring more oxygen-rich blood to your body.
Meanwhile, air toys can create negative pressure around your clitoral tissue, which can lead to engorgement.
It’s science!
More Wetness
Again, menopause does bring dryness, but it’s not permanent. The more sexually active you are, the more it promotes natural moisture production.
Once again, the reason is due to the nerve stimulation and increased blood flow that sex toys can bring.
Combined with water-based lubricants, sex toys can help you reach the big “O” much faster.
Great for Your Overall Health
Menopause can bring disturbed sleep, pain, stress, and depression. All of which a good orgasm can combat!
When you orgasm, your body releases endorphins, which can help you sleep and make you feel good.
Combine a good sex life with healthy eating and exercise for best results!
What to Look for in a Menopause-Friendly Toy
In terms of menopause-focused toys, there are several features that are important.
An External Focus

Menopause toys tend to focus on the clitoris and vulva, not internal stimulation. Menopausal sex requires extra prep to stimulate wetness and arousal.
You can also get rabbit toys that can bring the best of both worlds.
This is not to say that internal toys cannot be used. However, external toys should be where you start first when exploring.
Material? It Matters!
Obviously, you want toys made from body-safe materials. Porous toys, such as jelly materials, can absorb bacteria and be harmful to your vagina.
Look for non-porous toys, which are easy to clean.
These materials include silicone, hard plastic, glass, and metal.
Adjustable and Low-Intensity Controls
When you’re menopausal, your sensitivity can fluctuate just as much as your hormones do.
That’s why having adjustable vibration settings is important. In most cases, vibration toys already have this, but some don’t have detailed settings, only allowing you to choose high or low.
That’s why you should look for toys that have adjustable, incremental speeds, not just high or low!
Size and Shape

Bigger is not always better, especially if you feel extra narrow due to menopause. You’ll want thinner or smaller toys, especially if you want penetration.
Thin toys can help stretch you out gently without any injury. Generally, toys under an inch wide are the best for this situation.
Also Read: Best Sex Toys for Seniors
5 Toys For Menopause and Vaginal Dryness
Now, let me show you five products that work well for menopausal women.
Best Air Pressure Toy
Air pressure or suction toys use air to target the clitoris. By using air, the toys do not put any pressure on the clitoral tissue, making them perfect for menopausal women.
My personal pick? The Womanizer Liberty 2. The Womanizer line of air pressure toys is mostly well-reviewed, with the Liberty 2 being one of the best-reviewed ones.
Unlike some of the others, however, the Liberty 2 is more affordable and is travel-sized, perfect for the woman on the go.
It has 8 levels of intensity, making it perfect for fluctuating sensitivity levels. It’s also waterproof, meaning you can use it in the bath or shower without worry.
It’s completely rechargeable as well. Honestly, any from this line works well, but the Liberty 2 is the best starter one in my opinion.
Other dildos that are fun to use include any that are shaped like an object. For example, plenty of clitoral vibrators are shaped like roses, adding a bit of class when you have sex.
What makes this specific version extra fun is that it’s a limited-edition collaboration with Iggy Azalea, featuring a super-sleek metallic pink finish.
Because it’s a special edition that won’t be restocked, it feels a bit more exclusive and stylish than your average toy.
Since it’s designed for travel, it also comes with a clever magnetic cap.
It snaps right over the opening to protect the silicone tip from lint, dust, or anything else floating around in your bag, keeping it completely clean and discreet while you’re on the move.
For the best possible experience, try putting a little bit of water-based lubricant right around the rim of the tip. It helps create a perfect, airtight seal that makes the suction feel even more incredible.
Plus, Womanizer offers a 5-year warranty on this, so you know it’s built to last.
Best Thin Dildo
If you’re looking for a thin dildo, the Bobbi XLR8 is a good contender.
It has a whopping 15 vibration functions, making it perfect for the menopausal woman, and it’s curved to help you reach inside.
Its width is under 1 inch, making it great for those with thinner anatomy. And like any good vibrator, it’s made from silicone, waterproof, and it’s 100% USB-rechargeable.
What really sets it apart from traditional stiff bullets is its unique flexible design.
The body actually bends and conforms to your specific shape, allowing you to easily adjust the angle so the focused tip lands exactly where you want it.
If you ever want a quick surge of extra power, it also features a clever 12-second “Turbo Boost” button.
Pressing it kicks the motor into overdrive up to a wild 9000 RPM, which is perfect for a high-intensity finish right when you need it.
Even with all that power, it manages to stay relatively quiet with a low, deep-throbbing rumble rather than a high-pitched buzz.
It also comes with a 2-year manufacturer’s warranty, so you can feel confident that it’s built to last.
For the best experience and to protect the silky silicone, just be sure to pair it with a good water-based lubricant.
Best Warming Massager
Again, thinner is better, and a massager that’s been taking Ozempic should be one you want to consider.
One that I like is the Svakom Cici 2.
This G-spot vibrator has a largest insertable diameter of 0.8” and has a long handle for maximum comfort. Its insertable tip vibrates and also has a heating option.
Heating toys are perfect for relaxing the body and promoting blood flow, making them perfect for a menopausal woman.
In addition, the toy is waterproof, rechargeable, and relatively affordable.
Key features of this model include:
• Flexible Silicone Shaft: Designed to adapt to physical movements during use.
• Textured Design: Features a ribbed surface near the tip for targeted contact.
• Integrated Heating Element: Reaches a temperature of 100°F to simulate natural body warmth.
• App Compatibility: Connects via Bluetooth to a smartphone application for customized settings and remote operation.
• Memory and Travel Lock: Includes a function that restores the last used setting upon activation, as well as a safety lock to prevent accidental activation during transport.
• Maintenance and Warranty: Cleans with standard soap and water, and includes a 2-year manufacturer warranty.
Best Wand
Wand massagers are another essential item in a menopausal woman’s toybox. Not only are they great for external stimulation, but they also feel good on the muscles.
If you’re experiencing joint pain or arthritis, a massager will be your new best friend!
The Magic Wand is a great addition, with 4 speeds and 4 patterns for the woman who needs a slow burn.
It also has a flexible neck. If you don’t feel as flexible as you used to be, this feature can be a godsend.
What makes this model so versatile is that it harnesses AC power from the wall but lets you enjoy it completely cordless.
It features an extra-long handle that makes it easy to reach down your back or touch your toes for an all-over massage.
The smooth head is covered in a soft silicone that efficiently transmits the vibrations while feeling comfortable against the skin.
Operating the device is simple thanks to its straightforward 3-button control panel.
If you happen to find the battery completely dead, it is no problem at all—you can plug it directly into a wall socket and use it just like a traditional corded model so you never have to wait.
For the smoothest experience, it’s highly recommended to coat the head with a water-based lubricant.
Just keep in mind that this high-powered toy is strictly designed for external use only and should never be used internally or anally.
Best Couple’s Toy
Now, let’s look at a toy that can be perfect for an aging couple, particularly heterosexual or opposite biological sexes.
The Tenga PaiRING works well. If your male spouse is the same age as you are, he may have trouble maintaining an erection.
Cock rings work to restrict blood flow, keeping it up longer. The PaiRING has an attached thin vibrating dildo, which is perfect for the woman to use while the man pleasures himself.
Otherwise, couples’ toys are a little difficult to find when it comes to menopausal women.
A lot of them are double-ended dildos, which can be too thick for many when they’re experiencing menopause.
What makes this ring particularly comfortable is that it is made from a soft, stretchy, body-safe silicone with a special anti-dust coating.
It is designed to fit comfortably around most sizes while keeping cleanup incredibly easy.
All of its features are controlled by a single button, allowing you to cycle through 5 different vibration strengths and 3 unique patterns to customize the sensation exactly to your liking.
It is also 100% waterproof with an IPX7 rating, making it completely safe to submerge if you want to take your shared play into the bath or shower.
For traveling or storing it out of sight, it comes with a compact, lightweight storage case that cleverly doubles as a discreet charging dock.
How to Use Sex Toys Comfortably During Menopause
Your comfort is the number one rule. If it hurts, choose a thinner one or an air-powered toy.
If things feel uncomfortable, don’t force it in! If there’s pain and burning, the “No pain, no gain” rule doesn’t apply. Take it out immediately! Ignoring the pain could lead to injury.

Also, do not rely on your natural lubrication alone. There is no shame in using store-bought lubricant to help the toy go inside you.
When using a toy, water-based lubes are the best. Silicone lubes may damage silicone toys. Be sure to reapply the lube as needed.
Start slow and low! Insert only a little bit, and if it’s a vibrator, use the lowest possible setting. If you feel like the vibration could be stronger, go up as needed.
Being menopausal, the hormonal changes can mess with your sensitivity, so make sure that you find the appropriate level for how your body is feeling that day.
Also, be sure to clean your toys regularly. Most toys can be cleaned with mild soap and warm water, or antibacterial toy cleaner sprays, foams, or wipes.
Clean your toys before and after use. Remember, these toys are going inside of you, and you will want to treat your body right, especially as it ages.
Finally, if you’re hurting no matter what you do, there could be a deeper underlying problem. Talk to your doctor about it.
Yes, I know it can feel weird and uncomfortable to talk to a doctor about your sex life.
However, we all need to break the stigma of talking about sex when it’s appropriate to do so. Plus, your doctor has probably heard a lot more thank you think.
Best Lubricant to Use With Sex Toys
Lubricant deserves its own section, as it’s important when you’re menopausal. I mentioned in the last section that water-based lubricants are the best pick, but that is a little reductive.
I should also mention vaginal moisturizers, which are different from lube. Lubricants prevent friction during sex, while vaginal moisturizers help a dry vagina.
Moisturizers are applied a couple of times per week, and lube is applied several times during sex. You can use both during sex, but don’t think lube itself is a substitute for moisturizer.
Now, let’s talk about the different types of lube:
Water
Water is the default lube and is great for all types of situations. It does need to be reapplied frequently, but it can work on any type of sex toy.
Water lubes can also come in many flavors, though for a sensitive vagina, I would recommend going plain Jane.
Water tends to be the least expensive out of all of these, too.
Silicone
Silicone lubes do not need to be re-applied as much, and work well for sex with a penis-having partner.
But the issue is that silicone lubes can damage silicone toys. It does depend on the type of toy, so check your manufacturer’s instructions.
Silicone is also harder to clean after sex. Silicone lube is also a little more expensive than water, making it less ideal if you’re on a tight budget.
Hybrid
Hybrid silicone and water lubes offer the long-lasting appeal of silicone and the easy cleanup of water. They are also less harsh on silicone toys, but once again, follow your instructions.
Personally, I’d only use them on metal or glass toys myself. Hybrid lubes are also in between when it comes to cost, being cheaper than silicone but a little more expensive than water.
Oil
Oil lubricants, such as coconut oil, can be good for the skin. Not only are they good for sex, but they are great for massages or for vaginal skin health.
But they can damage latex condoms. Also, coconut oil lube tends to be on the more expensive side.
Obviously, lube is relatively cheap, and you can have several to choose from. But if you’re traveling and can only bring one, then water-based lube is the best one.
See Also: Best Sex Toys for People With Disabilities
When to Seek Medical Advice
Earlier, I mentioned talking to a doctor if you keep experiencing pain. However, there are other times when it’s important to talk to a physician.
If your vagina continues to be dry despite moisturizing, then it may be worth it to talk to a GP.
If you keep experiencing weird discharge, urinary discomfort, or irritation, don’t hesitate to talk to a doctor. You should also speak to them if you are bleeding after menopause.
Also, you can talk to your doctor even if nothing is particularly wrong. If you’re experiencing menopause or premenopausal symptoms, or you’re thinking about the future, asking for advice is not a bad idea.
Again, do not feel ashamed. Too many women do not discuss these issues with doctors, despite the privacy. In fact, only 44% of women talk to their doctors about menopause in general.
Menopause combines two things we don’t like talking about: our personal parts and getting older. But it’s a part of reality, and reality should not be ignored.
Often, these issues are easily treatable with the right medication or lifestyle changes.
Menopause is going to happen to any woman lucky enough to see half or almost half a century of life. It’s nothing to be ashamed of.
FAQs
Can Sex Toys Help With Vaginal Dryness?
Yes, sex toys can help with vaginal dryness! Sex toys can increase blood flow and promote natural lubrication when combined with moisturizers.
Are Clitoral Vibrators Better Than Internal Vibrators for Menopause?
Yes, clitoral vibrators are better, as menopause can make internal penetration feel uncomfortable without adequate preparation. That being said, look for air-based clitoral vibrators designed to be gentle on the clitoris.
Can I Still Have Sex if I Have Vaginal Atrophy or Thinning Tissue?
Yes, but it does require extra preparation. Use lots of lube, start with smaller toys, and ensure proper communication.
If sex is feeling painful or uncomfortable, do not hesitate to stop.






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